Tax Guru – Ker$tetter Letter

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Archive for the ‘humor’ Category

Tax Season has begun

Posted by taxguru on January 22, 2015

From Jimmy Kimmel via Newsmax:

Today was the first day you could file a tax return. If you filed a tax return today, congratulations, nerd.

People who file their taxes on the first day are the grown-up version of the kids who ask the teacher for extra homework in school.

The IRS suggests filing early to reduce the chance that someone will steal your identity and file before you. Honestly, if somebody wants my identity so badly they’ll file my tax return for me, go crazy. You can mow my lawn while you’re at it, too.

Parody from National Report:

IRS Declares Bankruptcy: Many Refunds Due Cancelled

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Another parody that could come true?

Posted by taxguru on January 12, 2015

I have always been a  big fan of parody and satire when it’s done well.  The Onion and National Report have been turning out great satire on the web.  I can’t resist the urge to post the tax related ones that may soon become reality, such as this one from National Report.

California Withholding Tax Refunds Due in 2015 Until 2016 –  This is so effective because it piggybacks on tactics that the rulers of the PRC have actually used in previous years, delaying tax refund payments in order to help the State’s cash flow.  It has also long been true that the FTB is much more ruthless and aggressive than the IRS when it comes to collecting taxes that it believes are owed.  It is not a parody that the FTB actually helps train IRS agents on how to more effectively squeeze money out of people.

 

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Beware of parodies

Posted by taxguru on November 12, 2014

National Report is at it again, and there is a good chance that some people will see this parody and think it’s true. 

Congress Eliminates Child Tax Credit, Mortgage Deduction And E.I.T.C From Tax Code

Update: It looks like some people did fall for this spoof and Snopes had to officially debunk it.

 

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Posted by taxguru on November 5, 2014

From Fred Thompson:

A new report shows that illegal poppy farming in Afghanistan is at an “all time high”, despite the US spending $7.6 billion trying to stop it. Maybe we should subsidize it instead. Stopped Solyndra cold.

 

From Argus Hamilton:

Canadian and U.S. officers last week surveilled Islamic converts prone to join ISIS whom profilers had refused exit passports. It’s a dilemma. North America is full of young men who want to join the violent armed group with no respect for Western laws, but the IRS is not hiring.

 

 

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IRS Refund Parody Fools Some People

Posted by taxguru on October 4, 2014

The Onion isn’t the only parody site that fools people with what appear to be true news stories.  This one from The National Report fooled some people because, as with all good humor, it is something that people could very easily believe to be true.  Of course, with the continuing financial fiasco in DC, I wouldn’t bet against something like this becoming reality in the future. 

2014 Federal Tax Refunds To Be Delayed Until October 2015

I learned about this from an article on Snopes.com.

 

 

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If not Accounting, what profession?

Posted by taxguru on August 6, 2014

I’ve been a huge  fan of Monty Python’s Flying Circus since I first saw them on TV in the early 1970s.  They had a series of live reunion shows in July at the O2 Arena in London.  The final show, on Sunday, July 20, 2014 was broadcast all over the world and was great.  

Here is a funny sketch from that final show making fun of Chartered Accountants, which are the UK equivalent of CPAs.  

 

 

In case YouTube blocks this video, here is a link to it on my ScreenCast page.

 

 

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Posted by taxguru on July 13, 2014

From Argus Hamilton:

The IRS said IRS official Lois Lerner’s e-mails about targeting conservatives in the 2012 election can’t be found. They said two years of Lois’s e-mails were lost because her computer crashed. It crashed when President Obama threw it out of Air Force One at thirty thousand feet.

 

The IRS chief said its back-up server that stored Lois Lerner’s e-mails was destroyed and recycled. Now her e-mails with the White House can’t be retrieved. The GOP just offered Ed Snowden immunity from prosecution and his Hawaiian girlfriend back if he’ll send them his copy.

 

Hillary Clinton accepted a huge gig at the University of Nevada Las Vegas in October. It’s the same campus where Obama spoke last year. Washington D.C. politicians are restricted to the UNLV campus because anybody who is eighteen trillion in debt is not allowed in the casinos.

 

From Conan:

President Obama said he wants his daughters to work minimum wage jobs because it builds character. The president then announced he will be raising the minimum wage to $50 an hour.

 

From Dixon Diaz:

Attention Hillary Clinton: moral bankruptcy does not qualify as “being dead broke.”

 

I own a business and I frequently interview people when I’m hiring. One of the questions I ask when I interview is, “Do you think Obama is doing a good job?” If they say “yes” I won’t hire them, because obviously they have no idea what it means to do a good job.

 

 

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Posted by taxguru on July 6, 2014

From Fred Thompson:

The IRS claims that it lost over 2 years’ worth of Lois Lerner’s emails in a computer crash. OK, I’ll accept that one when I can use “lost receipts” as an excuse in an audit.   

 

It’s not just Lois Lerner’s e-mails. The Internal Revenue Service says it can’t produce e-mails from six more employees involved in the Tea Party targeting scandal. But don’t worry, you can trust them not to screw up like this in calculating your Obamacare tax.  

 

The state of New York plans to grant citizenship and voting rights to illegal immigrants if they pay three years of taxes. Although they do risk deportation during that time if their soda cup is too big.

 

 

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Posted by taxguru on July 6, 2014

From Fred Thompson:

The Department of Justice is creating a special law enforcement group to investigate those it designates as domestic terrorists. They’ll start work as soon as they get that Tea Party list from the IRS. 

 

During a speech in Poland, President Obama said “governments exist to lift up their people”. Might work better if they stopped trying to lift them up by their taxes.  

 

Harry Reid said that the sale of his house would “create 60 jobs”. Well, that’s 60 more than he’s created as Majority Leader.

 

 

 

 

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Posted by taxguru on June 8, 2014

From Fred Thompson:

A new report shows that the building of the new DHS HQ is 11 years behind schedule and $1.5 billion over budget. Don’t worry, though. The government will get the time & money thing right when they’re running healthcare. 

 

A San Francisco billionaire plans to spend $100 million to support “pro-climate action” candidates across the country. I say eliminate the middle man and just buy a bankrupt solar company with it. 

 

The Chinese government is reviewing whether domestic banks’ reliance on high-end servers from IBM compromises the nation’s financial security. Well, it can’t be riskier than sinking $1 trillion in US Treasury Bonds.

 

 

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