Courtesy of the Late Show

10. Everything that goes to the IRS, I lick.

9. Every time I write the number “8,” I draw a hat on top to make it look like a snowman.

8. I try to deduct items that don’t exist, like jimrod… They’ll be figuring that one out for years.

7. With each tax return, include some of your favorite “Yo accountant’s so fat” jokes — like “Yo accountant’s so fat, he gets to claim his giant ass as a dependent.”

6. This time of year, I don’t wear underpants .

5. I don’t think it would be possible to make tax time more fun .

4. Aww crap — it’s tax time?

3. The big stacks of papers on my desk? I pour some maple syrup and eat ’em like pancakes.

2. Every year I get to leave the office for five minutes to be part of this stupid Top Ten list .

1. When I finish my work for the season, I treat myself to a whore.

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Why Investors Should Consider Real Estate – From the free WSJ.

Another Way to Sell Without Paying Taxes – A reminder of Section 1045, allowing sellers of small corporations to reinvest into other small corp stock. I recall when this was implemented in 1997, but haven’t actually had any clients use it yet.

As I’ve said countless times, no tax pro who is worth his/her salt has any reason to have the slightest bit of fear about losing clients to any of the do it yourself tax programs. In fact, just as there has long been a very lucrative market for us real tax pros in cleaning up H&R Block returns, there is similar opportunity in unscrambling DIY tax returns for those folks foolish enough to think a computer program can replace the expertise of an experienced human tax pro.

I don’t have time to answer more hate mail. So, for any H&R Block folks whose feelings may be hurt by the above comment, you need to lighten up and face reality. For at least the first two decades of my career, it was a frequent saying among CPAs and EAs that H&R Block was the best thing out there for generating business amending their returns. That’s a fact. Accept it and move on.