From Argus Hamilton:

The Rim Fire at Yosemite National Park in California burned on into its fourth week Monday. So far it’s charred a quarter million acres. However, Gov. Jerry Brown said it’s now all under control, he plans to tax and regulate the fire till it gives up and moves to Nevada.

 

The White House announced unemployment is at its lowest level in five years if you don’t count the people who have given up looking for work. Nobody partied on the news. Most Americans just want to know when the Dollar Store is going to start selling gas.

 

Australian voters gave a stunning victory to the Conservative Party Saturday. They elected a government that pledged to lower taxes, reduce crime, cut welfare and halt illegal immigration. Australia is clearly competing with Arizona as the site of the last stand.

 

President Obama jousted with Vladimir Putin over an attack on Syria Friday. There’s really no need to drop bombs. If President Obama really wanted to destroy Syria, he’d drop his economic advisors on the country and in six weeks we’d have them on their knees.

 

New Jersey resident Mario Scarnici was identified Sunday as the final winner of this month’s Powerball Lottery jackpot. He will take home sixty-two million dollars after taxes. He celebrated afterwards by telling his five kids that three of them can go to college.

 

California Controller John Chiang ripped the state’s bankrupt cities for irresponsible spending on retiree benefits to city workers and labor contracts. It will take years to dig out. Stockton is so broke the Ninety-Nine Cent Store has been accused of price-gouging.

 

Russia’s president Vladimir Putin was reported Sunday to have amassed a fortune of over seventy billion dollars since he took over the country. And this guy was raised a communist. Imagine how rich he’d be if he didn’t believe in the re-distribution of wealth.