Via NewsMax

Leno

Federal Reserve Chairman Ben Bernanke said a failure to reach a deal for the fiscal cliff will hurt the recovery. The good news is most Americans will not be affected by this because they had no idea there WAS a recovery.

According to the latest census poll, a large number of Californians are moving out of state and going to places like Texas and Nevada. Look, I know a lot of us are disgusted with the Lakers, but that’s no reason . . .

Both parties in Washington now agree that our country is headed toward a “fiscal cliff.” The bad news: We just elected a guy whose campaign slogan was “Forward.”

Some more good news — the president announced today he is not going to raise taxes on the entire 1 percent, just Donald Trump.

Letterman

Christmas is just around the corner. It’s just under two weeks away, and today Santa released 10 years of tax returns.

On the bright side, the end of the world kind of takes the edge off the fiscal cliff, doesn’t it?

Craig Ferguson

The latest report from the U.S. Census Bureau is out. For the first time, more people are moving away from California than are moving to California. People are leaving California in droves. To the people leaving California, I give you the traditional California farewell: “Adios, amigos.”