Tax Guru – Ker$tetter Letter

Helping real people win the tax game.

Archive for April, 2015

DemonRat Financial Hypocrisy

Posted by taxguru on April 29, 2015

Yesterday’s episode of NewsBusted had some good zingers on the Dims’ well deserved reputation for cheating on taxes and using corrupt means to raise campaign funds.

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From Jimmy Fallon via NewsMax:

Hillary Clinton wrote an Op-Ed for a paper in Iowa about her plans to help the middle class. Middle-class Americans said, “Why didn’t you just say that in a speech?” and she said, “Because I charge $200,000 for a speech.”

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There is a new reality show on CBS where a family must decide whether to keep $100,000 in a briefcase or give it away to another family. The show’s called, “We’ll Keep the Briefcase.” It’s the first 10-second-long show in history.

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The NFL recently agreed to give up its tax-exempt status. It sounds like a big change, but on the bright side, the Philadelphia Eagles can still write off Tim Tebow’s salary as a charitable donation.

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From Argus Hamilton:

Clinton Cash is a new book saying Hillary used her post as Secretary of State to greatly increase her family’s fortune via donations to the Clinton Foundation and high speaking fees for Bill. That’s not fair. She was only trying to close the income inequality gap between the Clintons and David Rockefeller.

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Late baby deliveries have become quite normal here in the U.S. Today’s infants peek outside the womb and see the size of the national debt and they refuse to come out.

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From Seth Meyers via NewsMax:

Hillary Clinton gave a speech at Columbia University this afternoon. She ended it the way Clintons always end their speeches, by saying, “That’ll be $200,000.”

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Bruce Jenner will reportedly make a return to motivational speaking. And it’s going to be a little tougher, because now he’s only going to make 77 cents on the dollar.

 

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Miraculous resurrected emails…

Posted by taxguru on April 29, 2015

In spite of the sworn testimony (perjury) by top IRS officials that Lois Lerner’s emails were destroyed  forever, some of them are now popping up.  Of course, the reason for the delay is obvious. The ones that actually mention how they were committing their crimes have been completely destroyed and the thousands of innocuous ones that don’t address their criminal actions are being dumped on the congressional investigators to slow them down.
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FoxNews: IRS watchdog recovers thousands of missing Lois Lerner emails

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The Hill:  Thousands of new Lerner emails found

Posted in Crooks, IRS | Comments Off on Miraculous resurrected emails…

All talk and no action…

Posted by taxguru on April 26, 2015

Overhauling tax code trendy on presidential stump, but real issue is will House GOP finally pass major reform?

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Unfortunately, the chances of any positive tax reform that will help our economy grow are slim because it would require opposing King Barack Hussein O and his Fellow Travelers in Congress, something the GOP in DC refuse to do.  As they have shown over the past six and a half years, the GOP would rather bend over and let bHo have his way with them rather than do anything he doesn’t like and be called racists by the mainstream media propagandists..

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IRS Campaign For More Operating Funds

Posted by taxguru on April 22, 2015

Just as King Barack Hussein O did with the budget created government shut-downs, IRS has been intentionally cutting back on the services that will piss off and inconvenience the public the most in order to gin up support for more money.

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 IRS Deliberately Cut Its Own Customer Service Budget

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IRS Hung Up Phones On More Than 8 Million Taxpayers

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“Resource Lacking” IRS Deliberately Ignored Your Phone Calls to Pay For Union Time And Bonuses

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IRS is the Anus of the Nation?

Posted by taxguru on April 20, 2015

Amusing and fairly accurate video on the IRS problems by John Oliver, including a song at the end sung by by Michael Bolton, where they liken IRS to a certain part of the human body that is stinky, but necessary.

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Posted in IRS, video | Comments Off on IRS is the Anus of the Nation?

“Tax Week” Jokes

Posted by taxguru on April 19, 2015

An assortment from some of the late night talk shows, via NewsMax.

Letterman

It’s two days until tax time. I know it’s late, but there is still time to deduct this show as a loss.

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I told my accountant a couple of months ago that I’m getting ready to retire, and he said, “Oh, no. You’re not getting out that easy.”

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It’s tax season. When I woke this morning and realized it was tax season, I said, My God, didn’t we just pay taxes last year?

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Today is tax day. A lot of people are hoping they get refunds. And that’s just the folks here in the audience.

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Conan

It’s April 15, tax day. The federal tax code is over 74,000 pages long. But stick with it because after page 72,000, it gets really good.

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Hillary Clinton is making income inequality a central theme in her campaign. Yeah, for example, today she pointed out that her husband makes $300 million a year. She has to get by on $200 million a year, and that’s not fair.

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Tax day was yesterday. And marijuana growers are complaining that they can’t write off a single expense thanks to federal laws. Well, apparently someone tried to claim the Phish tour as his home office and that’s not going to happen.

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Jimmy Kimmel

For the next hour, would you say you are relying on me to host the show? So, in a way you are depending on me? I can claim you as dependents. It makes for a big tax refund for me.

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The IRS specifically selected April 15 as tax day. They knew it was going to likely be a beautiful spring day and they wanted to ruin it for us.

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A study says that traffic fatalities go up 6 percent on tax day, presumably because people are rushing to the tax office and doing their taxes while they drive. If you are just realizing it is tax day, don’t worry about it. The IRS is pretty cool about this stuff.

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The only fun thing about filing your tax return is getting a refund. About 80 percent of taxpayers get money back, which is a weird thing to be happy about. That means you’ve been overpaying all year long. It’s like if someone broke into your house and the police recovered the stuff and brought it back and you said, “Oh, presents.”

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Tax Day Carols

Posted by taxguru on April 18, 2015

Katherine McPhee and James Cordon sing Christmas carols adapted for Tax Season.
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Another type of “Spring Break”

Posted by taxguru on April 18, 2015

Tax Break from Funny or Die.

 

 

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How To Make Tax Day Pie!

Posted by taxguru on April 18, 2015

A very different extreme way for DIYers to handle their tax returns from Funny or Die.


 

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Dave Letterman’s Tax Day Traditions

Posted by taxguru on April 16, 2015

Top Ten Things You Don’t Want To Hear From Your Accountant

Top Ten Things You Don’t Want To Hear From Your Accountant

Wednesday, April 15, 2015

10. “I reviewed your bank statements, and they’re hilarious”

9. “I lost your W-2, so I submitted two W-1s”

8. “I spent all night caressing your receipts”

7. “I thought YOU were doing MY taxes”

6. “I’m having a liquidity problem, if you know what I mean”

5. “Calculator? You mean my ‘Magic 8-Ball’?”

4. Is it pronounced I-R-S or ‘IRS’?”

3. “Sign and date next to the mustard stain”

2. “Don’t worry, it’s not loaded”

1. “Can I have your boat when you go to prison?”

How Many Guys In Bunny Suits Can Get Into H&R Block? (From 1997)

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